Do you try to convince yourself that something in your life is the right fit? Do you stay committed to prove your point? Do you see changing your mind as a negative? Do you believe backing out of a commitment makes you a failure?
Trying too hard usually stems from a childhood where your efforts were either not rewarded or were thought to never be good enough. You perceive yourself as being undervalued, underappreciated or a failure.
But aren’t we supposed to stick things out? Shouldn’t we keep trying until it gets better? Aren’t we conditioned to believe this?
If something isn’t working for you, you’re allowed to change your mind. You can change it today. Tomorrow. Or 20 years from now. You are allowed to do something differently. You are allowed to pick another path.
You can change your mind when you graduate. You can change it once you accept the job or change it once you’re married. You can change it even though people might think you’re “flaky”. You can change your mind when you are deep into your career. You can change it even though you are invested. You are allowed to choose something or someone else. You are allowed to quit.
This does not mean that you simply give up if anything gets too hard for you. If you have a tendency to do this, it’s important to determine whether you are quitting because it is too hard and you don’t want to deal with it, or because this isn’t the right thing for you. You don’t get to bypass everything vulnerable or challenging by quitting.
I hope this serves as a reminder that if something isn’t working for you, it’s ok to switch gears and to really think about what you want your next move to be. Changing your mind doesn’t mean that you knew less back then. The past you was just making decisions you knew how to make at the time.
Now, if you want, you can make other decisions. You’re not stuck forever.
Giving yourself permission to change is freedom.
Your choice is your choice. Period.
Carrie
