At the heart of self-hate are feelings of deep unworthiness. Self-hate hides itself well by concealing its overpowering and intrusive nature. Meanwhile, it ruins most relationships.
In order to hide the real feelings of hating ourselves, we end up playing things out in reality in some way. For instance, if I feel hatred towards myself, I subconsciously pick relationships that confirm my feelings of unworthiness. If reality doesn’t conform with what self-hate tells me I deserve, then I will tend to do something to sabotage my success.
So, whether I self-sabotage or I get others to participate in my downfall, the self-hate patterns can be quite creative in finding ways to make reality fit the “I am bad” picture.
If you struggle with depression or self-loathing, it is important to see a therapist so that you can work together to find solutions. Therapy is designed to help you learn how to cope with and challenge negative thoughts that consume your mind.
Carrie
i really appreciate your words of guidance