Imagine you have been placed blindfolded in a field. You are told that your job is to run around this field, but you can’t take the blindfold off. Unbeknownst to you, this field is filled with a variety of large holes. You are given only a tool bag and left to your own devices.
Inevitably, with time, you fall into a hole. While stuck at the bottom, you feel around inside your tool bag to see if there is anything in it that can help you find your way out. To your surprise, all your tool bag contains is a shovel.
So you dig and you dig and you dig. And you dig faster. But the hole isn’t getting smaller as you had hoped; it’s actually getting bigger. And bigger. And bigger.
So, you think to yourself, “Maybe I need a bigger shovel and I could really get myself out of this.”
But here’s the thing….shovels aren’t for getting out of holes – shovels make holes.
All of us do things that leave us feeling stuck, stagnant or that we are moving backwards rather than forward.
Often when we are trying to get ourselves out of a hole, such as depression or anxiety, we actually dig ourselves further and further into it. Out of our desperation, we quickly fall into believing everyone’s solution for getting out of the hole, only to be buried. This doesn’t mean that there is something fundamentally wrong with you, or that you are always going to do this.
But digging is futile. You’ve already tried all the obvious things. You’re smart. You’ve already done what makes sense to you. Yet you are still in the hole. Perhaps the things you’ve tried simply don’t work. Maybe these so called solutions are actually part of the problem.
Put down the shovel. Step back and put down your old strategies. Allow therapy to help you make room for new strategies and give you the gift of lifelong tools.
Carrie
