She put everyone else’s needs before her own. Saying yes was a habit and she was addicted to being needed.
Pleasing made her feel important, as if she were contributing. She yearned for outside validation and all of her self-worth and confidence came from the approval of others.
Who was there for her when she needed it? She realized the answer was nobody. But she taught people how to treat her, by how she treated herself. Putting herself last equaled treating herself poorly. At the very core, she completely lacked self-worth and confidence. It was time for a change.
Take the next step. Tell me your story.
Carrie
Is someone writing a biography of my life? These articles hit so close to home it’s creepy.
I learned this behavior as a small child and continued into my adult years. It was the only way to survive. Now I am forty-six years old and have hit rock bottom. As I was reduced to rubble the devastating discovery came that I had done myself out of life itself. Healing has been slow and painful. I still don’t know who I am, what I know or what I could become. Fear has a strangle hold on me but, I am peeling each finger back from my throat one by one. One day at a time.
Continue to take care of yourself. I wish you strength and peace.
I feel the exact same way. I wish we lived in the same town so we could talk each other through it.
I totally feel exactly that same thing! I am going through a divorce after more than 15 years, where I did everything to keep him happy in exchange for my own health, well being, sanity, family, friends, and even my own “morals”. Looking back I know I did it to myself just to make sure he LOVED me.